Pilot Point Bro Has the Cheapest 700 Pound Bench Press Going

Can I just ask whatever happened to good old fashioned range of motion? No way those elbows sniffed 90 degrees. I mean, can't most gymbro's toss up at least 550 with the elbows over 110 degrees? If I would've known that if I packed on a little chest mass to cheat the system, I coulda rocked the weight room back in the day even more than I did. Everybody knows chicks would rather see a lean, chiseled blogger press a gentleman's 250 at an honest 60 degrees anyway. Plus, at least I can wear a sport coat and scratch my back.

How Crazy Is Mrs. Benefactor to Think that Wiz Khalifa's "Young, Wild, and Free" and Cults "Go Outside" Use the Same Beat?

So the other day I'm walking around the house whistling Cults classic, "Go Outside," looking about as hip as you do in your dreams. All of the sudden the wife asks me why I'm whistling that song from Saturday's post-parade Snoop concert. Naturally I tell her she's crazy to think that Snoop would play a relatively obscure indie pop song for a heavily medicated and sunburned, hip-hop classic-craving sea of green. Even her accompanying friend agreed with her. Same song, old man. I've listened to each one a dozen times now, but since I can't write music, I can't technically explain how they're not even close without losing my mind. I mean we're one dirty dish in the sink away from divorce over here, and I can't have the IRS digging their noses around the WWCD books after neglected alimony payments. What if I'm wrong, though? What if one did adopt part of the beat from another? What if my wife's musical ear was more perceptive than mine? Do I even want to live in this world? There's no way, right?

Mi Cocina Chicken Fajitas Run Circles Around Gloria's and It's Not Even Close

So when me and the Mrs. are playin' it casual, we do it Mexican-style. When we lived in the M Streets, it was the Greenville Gloria's. Loved it. Now it's the Lake Highlands Mi Cocina as routinely as most average Joe's go to McDonald's. I know they're both semi-chains who've sold out and moved to the 'burbs, but they're still good for a quality start night in and night out. Plus it helps that at MiCo I get the five-start treatment and the back booth reserved for blogging moguls. After a few years of plowing through more Mambo Taxi's and fajitas plates than Urban Spoon, I went back to the ol' Gloria's stompin' grounds Wednesday and got the usual. Lemme me tell you... wasn't even in the same ballpark. Love the Gloria's bean dip and happy hour prices, but what little chicken there was seemed both bland and oddly shaped, the rice had no kick, and the beans were as flat as a Matrix jumper. I don't need a mariachi band or anything, but I do need a little pizazz, a little showmanship, and Gloria's was a one-way ticket to Disappointment Town. MiCo ftw, but those Taxi's at $8 a pop sting when it's hasn't been a strong 1Q aroud here.

A Brand New Cubes-Jerry Grudge is Born: Emmy Nods

Game, set, statuette Cubes, right? I really don't see it any other way. I see your patented wink, Jerry, but you can't beat the classically-trained delivery, iconic smile, and melt-your-heart eyes of one of America's few true multi-talented pioneers. I know it's probably blasphemy, but I never watched Dallas. If I did, and I had Bobby Ewing sharing my mogul-sized TV screen with a couple of true Dallas hero's, that's it. TV is done. Everybody go home.

There's Over Two Dozen Billionaires Living in North Texas, So Who the Hell Are These People?

So Frontburner compiled a nice, clean chart of your friendly neighborhood billionaires, all from the latest Forbes issue. As sports fans, we all know a few of the usual suspects, and educated, connected Dallasites like myself are quite familiar with many more. But what about the mouth-breathing D/FW simpleton who may know little else outside of the Twin Peaks happy hour specials, how much Romo sucks, and the playlist of 97.1 FM? WWCD is here to help you. Yes, you.

#16 (world rank)- Alice Walton, $26.3 billion
One of Sam Walton's four kids, and the second-richest American woman. While her sprawling ranch is near Mineral Wells, she'd rather spend her time driving drunk in Weatherford, cause what else are you gonna do?