Beware the DART Seats This Week After a No-Pants Sunday

Do these freakshows fail so miserably at not calling enough attention to themselves during the week that they have to spread crotch rash all over modest public seating? That blonde ass at the :51 mark can sit on my lap on the 11:45am Red Line to Mockingbird Station any day though. Either way, it's bad enough that they have to expose innocent bystanders and fellow passengers to pasty, hipster thighs, mid-winter shrinkage and misguided social enthusiasm, but to do it on Tebow's Day? For shame. Keep Austin weird, not Dallas.